Dear Everybody, Please Stop Shaming Successful Women

Kristyna Zapletal
3 min readOct 27, 2021

Body shaming, slut shaming, gender shaming, parent shaming… how many women have never fallen victim to any of those? And don’t you dare them to run a company, make a ton of money, lead a huge team, win a prestigious competition, raise some good people, or create a masterpiece — then the nasty one elegantly waltzes in:

Behold the ever-popular success shaming.

Shaming comes from a place of deep insecurity. And what can make people more insecure than a woman succeeding at a tough job, whatever it may be.

Because we know that on average women are physically weaker. We know that their starting line is often not the same as it is for their male peers. We know that, to win in a world ruled by men, they need to double, triple, or quintuple their efforts. We know that the gender pay gap is real. We know that they often hold more jobs at once, among others that of a child birther, a parent, and an executive household manager.

How could she even pull it off?

Maybe she’s too pretty. Or too ugly.

Nothing in between.

Maybe she was born into a family with money.


Maybe she simply slept her way to the top.

Don’t they all do that?

Maybe she doesn’t have ANY personal life left.

How dull.

Maybe she doesn’t even have kids.

Oh, that’s why!

And don’t forget how unhappy she must be, most likely lonely AF. And her partner barely holding onto the thread of life, since she surely never serves him a warm homemade dinner.

You’ve probably heard about Godwin’s law, which says that if any online discussion is long enough, someone eventually trots out a comparison to Hitler. Maybe we can define a new law that any discussion, online or physical, about any successful woman eventually always comes to:

  • Her capability of being a good girlfriend/wife.
  • Her capability of being a good mother. (Or being a mother at all.)

I personally come from a small European country where “not cooking” at home for your man (let…